Too often, we forget how essential it is to care for our children on an emotional level. We make sure that they are clothed, fed, and have a warm bed, yet those are not the only things that are important in a child’s life.
It is a fact that just because your child or children have what they need on a physical that they have what they need on an emotional level.
Whether you like to admit it or not, the steady invasion of violence on TV, movies, video games, newspapers, and even in music lyrics are harming children. As a result, many children are becoming desensitized to violence; therefore, they should learn that anger is not a way to solve problems.
Violence is learned, and so is calmness!
As parents, we should be educating our children to manage their emotions. If you are not already doing the following things, you should probably think about starting.
Your children probably express their emotions differently to you, which is okay, yet they should learn to handle anger in the right way.
Children display anger because they don’t know how to express their frustrations in any other way. Kicking, hitting, screaming, swearing, or throwing things could be the only way they know how. Asking how you feel, is unrealistic, because they may not have learned the words to tell you.
Help them express their anger by creating a feeling word poster to think of all the words they could use to tell us that they are angry. They should not go through these emotions unable to express themselves.
It’s good to remind your children that it is important to talk positively about themselves, as this will help them to motivate themselves.
Talk to your children about things that they might find uncomfortable. They do need to know that they are not alone with feeling these feelings and emotions. e.g., sadness doesn’t feel great, yet it is unavoidable.
Allow them to express themselves creatively. Bottling up emotions is not a good thing.
The best way to teach your children how to cope with anger constructively is by showing them through your example!
You could make a big poster listing a few ways to help children calm down when they first start to get angry. Walk away, run around the block, listen to music, hit a pillow, shoot baskets, kick a ball, draw pictures, talk to someone, or sing a song. Once a child chooses their “calm down” technique, encourage them to use the same strategy each time they get angry.
Set an example for your children. Don’t overreact or lash out as they mimic what they see and not what they told.
Your children should learn to think before they act. There are consequences for every reaction.
We all have little signs when we’re getting angry, which we should listen to, to help us stay out of trouble. Recognize the warning signs such as, talking louder, clenching fists, heart-pounding, dryness in the mouth, and breathing faster. Once they are aware of them, start pointing them out to whenever they get frustrated.
The more we help kids recognize those early angry warning signs, the better they will be able to calm themselves down.
Anger is contagious.
It’s best to make a rule in your home; In this home, we solve problems when we’re calm and in control. And consistently reinforce that rule.
Your children should know that they can come to you about anything. They need to feel secure and safe with you, without you judging them.
It is a great idea to use books and movies which they can relate to, to help teach them when someone is sad, ask them how they feel. Go through the emotions to teach them the ways you think they need to know how to deal with them.
Label your emotions, so your children know what is going on within you. Don’t leave them guessing.
Spending time outdoors in nature does wonders to help people relax, and the sun is vitamin D, which is excellent for everyone.