If you an introvert, you might not have many social connections. You might feel as if you have no friends at all. Most of us feel this way sometimes. Why do you feel as if you don’t have any friends you can trust and rely on?
Here are the five very common reasons why.
1. Your social connections are too superficial
This is a very common reason you might feel as if you have no friends. We live in times where people think quantity is way more important than quality. So those belonging to the younger generation believe that they need to have a specific number of people in their social circle.
What you should realize is that in reality, friendships are not some game score. Regardless of how many friends you have, it’s the quality of the connection that really matters.
If the people you call your friends don’t share the same values and aspirations as you, you can’t call them your friends. These people who only speak superficial and routine stuff will not be in your life forever.
2. You are in the wrong company
Sometimes your emotional attachments might blind you. You might be associating with a person you call a friend but leave you as soon as things get complicated. They won’t have your back when you need them the most. Your so-called friends turn out to be fake and manipulative.
In the presence of so-called friends like this, you might feel drained and insecure. You might open up to them only to realize that they are backstabbers who use everything you said as food for gossip. All these incidents take place when you are in the wrong company. Losing a friend can hurt, but it is definitely better than being in the wrong company.
3. You are overly guarded
You can’t always blame others. There might be times when not having friends can be your fault, too, especially if you’re an overly guarded person. If you are this sort of a person, then you won’t let others into your life. Those with trust issues, introverts, individuals with mental illnesses, and trauma survivors might experience the inability to let people into their lives.
People like this have a hard time opening up to others. If someone hurt you in the past, it will leave you reserved and cautious of meeting new people. Although you might have a fair reason to be overly guarded, you might have to loosen your grip when interacting with people.
4. Your communication skills need improvement
If you lack communication skills, you might have a hard time finding friends. Things like not looking interested, poor listening skills, conversational narcissism, sending confusing non-verbal cues, and being overly negative can lead to a hard time in making friends.
5. You are a loner
If you are a loner, then you might not have any friends. Loners have very little need for social interaction. If you’re a loner, then it is who you are, and that is completely fine. Even having a few loyal friends is more than enough.
If you suffer from a social anxiety disorder or are shy, it may seem easier to avoid making friends. However, research has shown that people with close friends live longer and are generally healthier. People with close friends are better able to cope with the death of a spouse or major changes in their life.
How to Make New Friends
Below are tips to help you make friends.
- Don’t be afraid to meet new people. Make an effort to introduce yourself even at a grocery store, gym, or online.
- Don’t be afraid of rejection. You may not connect with every person. Some friendships are meant to long term, and others could be just temporary.
- Find people with common interests. Join groups or do volunteering work.
- Be open with people. Should they ask you a question about yourself, always answer truthfully. If you don’t want to discuss it, say so. Be yourself and don’t act like someone else to impress them, or they will like you for the wrong reasons.
- Be friendly. Smiling and saying “hello” to new people is a good way of making friends, also giving them compliments.
- Do not come on too strong if you want to make new friends. Yet ask for their contact details.