To be very honest, we all carry grudges towards someone or something. It is not only about being mistreated, but you could also carry grudges/resentments/anger when you have lost a loved one.
Maybe you should stop to think about how these emotions are affecting you! At the end of the day, those feelings are like weeds; they multiply and consume you.
Resentments turn into anger
Anger is an uncontrollable force that takes over us and leads us to say things we wouldn’t usually say. Holding on to it will take over your emotions, leaving you feeling helpless.
The truth of the matter is that external circumstances do not cause anger. Anger is a state of mind, only you can make yourself angry. You and only you have the power to control your state of mind.
These emotions affect your body
The effects of anger/resentment/grudges can be mental and physical. Our minds are like a busy highway that never stops thinking, worrying, judging, etc. that’s why there are times when you can’t sleep. Your mind is probably overactive.
The problem with resentments is the unhealthy thinking, replaying, and blaming of people. Holding on to emotions can lead to adverse effects, both physically and emotionally.
Overthinking things can manifest in a whole new bunch of problems.
Resentments ruin relationships
Unattended resentments can lead to unhealthy outburst due to bottled up emotions. Outbursts can hurt your loved ones mentally, verbally, or physically and could isolate you from them.
A good thing to remember is that no one is perfect. We could hurt people intentionally and unintentionally and vice versa. By holding on to grudges/resentment/anger, you could become a resentful, bitter, unpleasant person. Blame catapults us into more suffering.
Letting so of resentments, you discover that everybody is doing the best that they know-how.
Resentment arises from ignorance and also from an unjustifiable sense of entitlement.
I cannot believe they would say that to me.
I’ve been treated unfairly.
It’s unfair that my loved one stolen from me.
Most resentment is in defense of the self, and ignorance makes it difficult for us to see things visibly.
If you realized that forgiving another, you are healing yourself. You would be able to walk through life with a heart filled with love and a peaceful mind. Forgiveness is the key to your freedom.
Forgiving the actions does not mean that you have to forget, or that you have to keep that someone in your life. It just means that you have to move on.
Most people are just doing the best that they know-how. It is all part of life to be human and getting hurt or by being hurt, someone. When you understand this, you can learn to forgive easier, and heal yourself.
Forgiveness is the only emotion that will free you from the pain and hurt.